Tuesday, May 7, 2013

The Big G Word

It is so easy to get upset at people. Talk about people. I can't believe what she was wearing. What she said. How she is acting. I can't believe she decided to do that. I can't believe she dresses her child in that.

All things I have heard, a lot, and some I have fallen into myself. Guilty.

For me, it's mainly getting upset at how people are acting, or what they are saying, or don't do or say.

It's easy to get upset and it's easy to judge. But what's not easy. Giving the big G word. 


It is something we all want. But how easily and how often do we give it?

God has been opening Hubby and my hearts for the past few years on this subject. And really expanding it even more over the past year and months.

If someone does something, says something, acts a certain way, our first reaction should be why. What is the underlying reason that might be affecting them. Not I can't believe... and getting upset, talking meanly, harboring grudges. And that's coming from someone (achem... me) that gets hurt fairly easily. ;)

We want God to have grace on us, right? And he DOES. We want people to have grace on us. Maybe some do and others don't. But God *freely* gives it to us. Why can we not freely give it to others?

It shouldn't matter if others give us grace because we know what we are supposed to do. Give it, even if we don't receive it. Love. Like He unabashedly and unceasingly loves us. Unceasingly! We do not for a minute *deserve* that. (We don't *deserve* anything. As much as I want to say I deserve that bowl of Moosetracks ice cream or some time by myself to roam Target with a freshly brewed Peppermint Mocha {no whip no foam ;)})

If somebody does something to hurt, offend, or bug us... we first need to remember they are the good-willed friend (or family) we are siblings with in Him, or strangers that might not know Him or have ever heard the good news, or people you do know but might be going through a tough time.

It is easy to judge, but let's not. Let's give grace. 

Our course of action should be grace, prayer, and be kind to one another and build each other up. Everybody... every... body. Not just people you think are cool. Not just people you think you can get something from. Not just people dress "cool." (My yoga pants and I are obviously not included in this category ;)) I think some think they are doing this, but are not, maybe even unintentionally, and I'm sure I fit into that too.

Let's care more about people and less about what we think cool looks or sounds like. 

The power that could come from giving grace can be amazing. Not letting the devil get in the way of our love and acceptance of people and their (our) odd actions sometimes. ;) Where is our focus? On being cool, accepted, in the right clique, judging others.

He shows no prejudiced in giving grace, why would we? He doesn't divide us because He thinks some of us are more cool than others. He loves all.

Everybody is weird. We're all weird. I'm breaking it to you now, you're weird. ;)

We all have quirks. Some quirks worse than others. ;-) We all say things that we shouldn't say, do things we shouldn't or don't even mean to do. We know we have messed up and we hope that others are able to forgive us and give us grace. Very hope. ;)

Let's give grace. Forgive. Let's let it go or sweetly confront someone in love and let them know that something is bothering you. We should all want someone to tell us if we're done something to offend someone or we're just acting like goofballs. Strengthen one another. Give grace.

Who cares if someone is a name dropper, that just means they're excited about something. Who cares if someone talks about how great their kid is, that just means they are proud parents and that should make us smile. Who cares if someone spells a word wrong on social media, such a silly thing to make a big deal of. Who cares if someone is happy all the time, we should yearn to be more like that.

The devil sure doesn't want us to all be united and he will do anything and everything he can to break all of us up. He wants to put doubts in our minds about others, our mission, our life.

I can tell you that I have not felt very built up by a lot of friends lately. Actually quite the opposite.

I have struggled with seeing (and personally feeling) how so many girls negatively treat other ladies; ranging from through social media to even a couple pretty strong churches that we've been part of. Ladies are made to feel left out, unliked, and even made fun of for not being the loudest voice to talk over everyone to have their stories heard. It makes me so sad. I was even told by another sweet sweet mama that her self confidence skyrocketed when she left one of those churches. Honestly, I felt somewhat the same way. We have some new friends, who aren't Christians, that are more welcoming and inclusive than a large part of the believers we know. And they have a large strong group of long time friends and are so sweet to include us. I could stand to give out more grace in this area. When I am hurt, I retreat from that person. Withdraw. I don't even give hugs, and you know I'm a hugger. ;) I know it's not the right way to handle it and I'm working on it. I have, maaany times, felt judged for being nice or even overly nice to those who are not that nice to me, as if I am naive.

Being kind to those who are not very nice to you is not naive, it's what God calls us to do. 

It is hard sometimes but He gives us strength and gives us EVERYTHING. It is hard for me when I feel like I am trying hard in a friendship to be a good friend and it is not reciprocated. But I know there can be many reasons for that and Hubby sweetly reminds me to keep loving and being kind and having grace. And I know that I fail.

We want to give unlimited grace to others, just like He does for us all, and we hope that others have grace on our weird selves when we mess up too.

On our deathbeds, are we going to say we're glad that we judged people and harbored grudges. Or we would have wanted to give more grace and show more of His unfailing love. To everybody. It takes being intentional. Constantly. Woo, I know I need to do better.

I hope all of that came out ok. If not, please have grace on me. ;)

Romans 5:8 But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. 

We are SINNERS and Christ died for us. Others may fail in our eyes and we're just going to sit and judge and not forgive them?

Ephesians 4:1-3 Therefore I, the prisoner of the Lord, implore you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love, being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.

Ephesians 4:32 Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.

Colossians 3:12-13 So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you.


Blue-Eyed Bride said...

I love everything about this, D. And I love your heart! Thank you for sharing and speaking truth. Xoxo

In This Wonderful Life said...

Such a wonderful post! I could not agree more. You are an amazing lady! xo

Lora Lynn @ Vitafamiliae said...

Well said, girlie. Proud of you!

Beth said...

Thanks for the sweet and gentle reminder to us all! You're not alone in feeling the need to do work in this area. I appreciate your transparency. xoxo

Rebecca Stanley said...

Love this my sweet friend. I'm just so bummed I didn't get to hug your neck in person while we in DC - next time:-) thanks for sharing this!!

Rebecca Jo said...

Wait... I'm weird? :) I already knew that - that's ok! haha!

Love this... I know people who exude grace & I see how peaceful their lives seem to be. I'm constantly working on it. I blame my mother making me come from an Italian family that holds me back from grace all the time :) haha!

Nicole Seitz said...

While I was reading this amazing grace came on the radio ;) You are an amazing women nicely done !

Anna @ The Things I'm Learning said...

I love this post! Thank your for sharing the truth with us today!

Erica said...

Thank you for your honesty. This post is such a great reminder for me. It is all too easy to get caught up in the ways of the world...

Lauren said...

amen girl...I definitely need to practice more grace with everyone around me, especially those other mommas who are just trying to do their best!

Desiree Lynn said...

This is beautiful. We were just talking about drama at work yesterday. God has such perfect timing, to have me read this just when I need it.

Lindsey said...

This is such a great post and so well written! Love it!

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